Posts That I Need to Do if I Ever Get the Time

1.) The Birth Story of Marissa

2.)  How the First Three Weeks of Motherhood Sucked So Badly

3.)  How Freakin’ Cute My Kid Is

4.)  The 10 Books I Plan on Writing that are better than any other sucky pregnancy/baby book out there.

And Here I Thought 2010 Couldn’t be Topped

So it’s been a big year.  I started off the year deciding that it was time to leave the program I’d been working on for 5 years and venture into Program Management.  The week before I started the new job I took a little pregnancy test (well, I took two because I wasn’t smart enough to read the first one) and realized that it probably wasn’t the best time to change jobs, but alas, I had already signed on the dotted line. 

So 2011 was pretty much the year that started out with vomiting and ended with the best thing that has ever been in my life.  I look back on the other years in my life and although many were wonderful, none of them even come close to this year.  Nothing in my life even comes close to the way I feel when I hold our little girl and see her pretty little smile.  Or here her coo.  She has brought so much to my life but the greatest thing that has come out of having her is my sense of self. 

I used to feel awkward at parties, feel like I had to hang on to Mircea or another friend, or draw attention to myself with my big mouth.  I was recently at a party and I just sort of hung out in the corner, but I was smiling and enjoying those around me.  Having Marissa brought me this sense of wholeness and completeness.  I don’t need to impress anyone, I don’t need to be anyone in particular.  I need to be a good whole person and provide a loving, nurturing home for my daughter.  That’s it.  It’s not that she’s my entire world, and it’s not that she provides me with my sense of self, but having her made me realize what is truly important.  It’s important that I get up and go to work so I can make money and have a sense of accomplishment in my day.  It’s important that I drive safely so I can be there for my family.  Along those same lines, it’s important that I diet and exercise to extend my life.  The most important thing to me now is being a whole person so that I can be 100% for my daughter.  And it’s a good feeling to know that I only have to answer to three beings:  God, myself, and Little Marissa.  Everyone else in my life are the cherries on top.

So while 2010 was a great year, 2011 trumped it by a million and 2012, well, if the world doesn’t end, I think you’re going to be the best year yet. 

Happy New Year!

These Last 10 Days Can Shove It

I am sorry that my updates are so sporadic, and frankly, not even all that interesting.   When I get home from work I’m just too darned tired to get on the computer and think of something fun, witty or quirky to say.  There are no tv shows to review, though I did recently start watching Burn Notice and Big Bang Theory, I am still reserving my judgment on both shows.  I’ve been listening to the Janet Evanovich audio books and I’m enjoying them too, but I can’t say I’m hooked.  Though I would like to eat some Pino’s pizza. 

We had an interesting week last week.  You probably heard about it on the news.  We started out with an earthquake and went out with a bang with hurricane Irene.  Good times.  The earthquake scared the living daylights out of me.  I’m on the 3^rdfloor at work, but its 4 stories up and the building was swaying and I was genuinely afraid that a plane had crashed (since I work on a Naval Air Station this wouldn’t be a gigantic surprise) or a truck had run into the building.  The upshot is that I was pretty sure that I was going to be buried in a pile of rubble.  I wasn’t really scared for me so much as I was scared for our little girl.  I’m trying so hard to protect her and then I’m getting myself in earthquakes.  But luckily everything was fine and the worst injury I got was when I slipped off the sidewalk and twisted my ankle because the crowd was rushing me. 

Too Bad They Don't Have Maternity Shirts

The hurricane was uneventful.  Mircea and I hunkered down with the boys in the basement and played Clubhouse Games on our Nintendo DS.  It was really hot down there and since our back door is protected by our deck we had the door open so it was kind of loud but really sort of underwhelming.  However, the next several days were quite “whelming” as we didn’t have any power.  Our awesome neighbors hooked us up to their generator so we didn’t lose anything in our big freezer but my sanity was hanging by a thread since I couldn’t take a warm shower or have a fan blowing on my big pregnant self at night.  Let’s just say I’m not cut out to be Amish.  We were so lucky though; some trees fell in the woods, but nothing in our yard or near our house.  Some of the other neighbors weren’t so lucky.  But as we sat there playing card games every night after work we counted our blessings and on Wednesday evening when the power came back on we whooped for joy and bathed in warm water.  Ahhh.

A little ways up our street

The Ahhhh quickly wore off for me when I went to the Doctor on Wednesday.  I don’t have my official diagnosis yet, but at the very least I have a Urinary Tract Infection and at the worst a kidney infection (which is why I kept waking up with this weird back pain-it was my darned kidneys).  Both of these options are not fun, particularly since I have a 4+ lb baby resting her head oh-so-gently on my bladder.  Speaking of the baby, yeah, we’ve only got about 6-8 weeks before we meet that little lady.  I can’t wait.  And yes, I’m terrified of delivery.

So today I’m going to leave work a little early, take my giant bucket of cranberry juice up to my bed and watch the Lion King.  Hakuna Matata people, Hakuna Matata.    

 

It Means No Worries

 

 

My Confession: Glee, I Love You

I’m not going to lie to all you Gleeks out there. I thought you were total losers. Lame-Os. Seriously, who wants to watch a show about high-schoolers where everyone breaks into song at completely irreverent times? I mocked you nerds for an entire year and then last September I was watching tv and saw the promo for Glee and I said “well, I don’t have a damn thing to do tonight, let’s mock some nerds”. (I didn’t say this)

Yeah, I got this photo from Teen.com

Well, I didn’t have that much to mock when I actually watched it. The characters are really well developed (with the exception of the African American boy who never speaks but is often in performances, not sure what that’s about) and the issues that are addressed are pretty real for a lot of high-schoolers. The writing is witty as all get out and although I began my Glee addiction actually fast forwarding through the musical numbers because I thought they were lame, I’ve recently downloaded some of the Glee songs. Do you know why? Two words: Darren Criss.

Holy heck this guy makes the show for me. Not because he’s good looking (and over 18 mind you). The Warblers made me really enjoy the music on the show and I’ve even gotten to the point where I can listen to the over-singing of Michelle Lea without fast forwarding. I thought Darren Criss was the perfect addition to this show, and the crush that Kurt had on him was a perfect story line. The character that Criss plays, Blaine for all of you that still resist this perfectly wonderful show, is just amazing. Now I’m not a gay man in high school, but I just love the way his character exudes an outward confidence in the person that he is, although readily admits to insecurities that he doesn’t let rule his life. How great is this for any high school (or younger) kid to hear? Oh, and did I mention that he’s hot?

So you’ve got a little over a month to get over your mocking, to let go of that “I’m not going to follow what all of the dorks at my office watch on TV” attitude and get caught up on Glee before the new season starts. They are on streaming Netflix so you can get all the ins and outs of the Rachel-Finn-Quinn love triangle, which I actually find painfully boring since I think all three characters are shallow and pedantic. ($1 to my friends that know that quote. No cheating, you just have to know what it’s from right off the bat. I’ll know if you Googled it. I know these things)

To tide you over, here’s my favorite Glee song so far, featuring Blaine and the Warblers. Enjoy!

I Love This!

Every time I see this commercial I just want to squeal. I love the look that the mom and the adorable little girl share and then when “Lilli” jumps up to the jogging stroller. I just love this commercial so much-I’ll admit, I’ve rewound it on the DVR just so I could see the little head cock and “Hi” that “Lilli” does.
I can’t wait to meet my daughter and take her “jogging”. Ok I can’t wait to meet her and maybe take her on a slow walk with her fur brothers. I just really look forward to those years when my little girl is still young, sweet and innocent and still loves me.

Pet Peeves: Bring ‘em On

That’s kind of a loaded question because most of us don’t have just one pet peeve. We have a long list of things that drive us nuts and a hopefully much shorter list of things that make us want to go ballistic and start spewing hot lava out of our mouths. (This has only happened to me once, it was scary.) Since I’m in a snarky mood this morning and someone did this to me already today, I’ll start with one of my biggest pet peeves.

• You know when you walk by someone who is in a conversation with someone else and they try to bring you in with something lame like “Oh and then we’ll get Kate to join us later, blah blah blah”? Or the even more annoying, “oh yeah, that sounds like something Kate wouldn’t like” or some other stupid, unrelated comment to bring someone else into the lame conversation that I am not even slightly interested in. I hate this. This usually occurs on the way to the bathroom or when you have a friend waiting downstairs to take you to lunch. One of my co-workers does this all the time, and usually, he skulks away because frankly, he had no clue what he was doing in the first place and needed my competent butt to save his. 
• Do not axe me a question. The sentence is “we were going to” not “we was going to” and you did not “seen” him earlier, you saw him. What the hell school did some people go to? Seriously? This happens at my office every day with college educated people. And that’s something else I’ve learned; a college education means diddly squat for having a brain. I know a total moron, TOTAL moron who is getting a 4.0 in his Master’s program. I’m not 100% sure that he can breathe and think at the same time he’s so dumb.
• People that read while driving. Is there anything else that I can say about this? Are you seriously getting caught up on the news while you are driving your car? How many accidents has this caused? Why is this not illegal but talking on a cell phone is? WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE?
• When couples say “we’re pregnant”. This is not one of my top pet peeves, but it’s weird. We aren’t anything. We had sex and soon we will have a baby, but we are not pregnant. We do not get up 1000 times in the middle of the night to pee; we don’t even hold each other’s hair when we are throwing up. We don’t have what feels like a large fish swimming around our belly and our boobs don’t hurt. Also, on a side note, I am not eating for two. Baby doesn’t want the chocolate cake-I want the damn chocolate cake, but if it makes your fat butt feel better to claim it’s the kid that wants it, so be it, but my fat ass wants the cake.
• Young men’s jeans. What the hell are you wearing? You fall into two camps but you share one
  

  the purse drives the look home

  common denominator, showing your damned underwear. The first came is the ridiculous baggy pants, riding fully under your butt and when you are running down the street in my neighborhood, you are grabbing the crotch to hold them up while you run. (I have no idea why the crotch is the best place to hold to keep your pants up unless you’re just trying to touch your junk. When my pants are too loose (ha!) I wear a belt or kind of grab at the side but you will never see me holding my crotch and running after my friends. Well, never again. The other camp of young men jeans wearers are the skinny jeans. This actually pisses me off way more than the baggy jeans. First of all, you look like a tool. I mean seriously, skinny jeans on anyone don’t really impress me, but skinny jeans on a greasy looking teenage boy make me want to 1.) shout out the car window and tell them they look stupid and 2.) shout out the car window for their parents’ phone number so I can call them and tell them to get their kid some jeans that don’t look so freakin’ stupid. And if the skinny jeans themselves weren’t enough there is this “fashion forward” way of wearing them that involves pulling them down over your butt and tight ass walking around with those on. WTH is this? It looks like a teenage boy borrowed their elementary school sister’s jeans and wore them out. There is often a really ridiculous belt associated with this look as well. Hey, at least they aren’t holding their crotch in the skinny jeans…

• Walking in the middle of the road and giving a car behind you a dirty look when they want to drive. What is this? When exactly did the road become the sidewalk and cars aren’t welcome on it? (Why is it that so many of my rants involve the road? And teenagers? I’ll tell you why, my frakin’ neighborhood with all its teenage hoodlums.) I will be driving down the road in my super quiet “Sneak up and run over the skateboarders” Prius and there will be a wall of kids, 5 or 6 thick just walking in traffic. So I slow down and they keep looking back, but do they get over? NO they do not get over; they keep walking, talking and being losers. My other favorite is the skateboarders in my neighborhood (by the way if anyone buys my kid a skateboard I will come to your house and bash you over the head with it. I’m not kidding. TRY ME) who have their headphones in and lackadaisically skate down the street all while being tailed by a white Prius with an irate pregnant woman in it. They coolly look back and every once and awhile they get over, but my favorite is when they have to do some sort of skate trick (that inevitably) fails, right in front of my car. This is a thing of beauty. One last trick, one last “eff you” to the driver who wants to drive on the street. And this trick usually involves the moronic kid attempting some sort of skatey flip thing and falling to the ground. I will admit, one time, ONE TIME, I looked around to see if there were any witnesses and I considered driving right over this asshole because he does this shit every single day. Hey, I didn’t do it. I’m still going to Heaven, right?
• People who don’t courtesy flush. There are no fans in our bathrooms at work. When you go potty, do a courtesy flush, just do it. The stink factor goes down exponentially and although you may get a bidet like splash from our ridiculously sprinkly toilets, it will be a refreshing part of your day.
• Stopping dead in your tracks while walking to answer your phone, look at your grocery list, or pick your nose. This is best done when you are in the entrance or exit of the grocery store. Even better when it’s raining and you are trapping people out in the rain while your fat butt gets all situated with your cart. I guess the real pet peeve is that no one gives a rat’s ass anymore about the people around them. All courtesy is gone. People walk around as though they have blinders on and the only people that matter are themselves and maybe their family. And what happened to these two words “excuse me”? Why must people just push and attempt to jam by, when two little words of polite, cordial attitude will get the large pregnant woman out of your way when you decide that the shortest distance between point A and B is the line in front of the butcher counter at Nick’s.
  

  You Talkin' to Me?

• Anyone who doesn’t like Peyton Manning. Shut up, he’s awesome. Now his brother Eli…

So what are your pet peeves? Am I dead wrong on these? Do you like skinny jeans on a man? Are you a skateboarder (if so, give me your address, I’ll teach you a lesson. Seriously, I’m a fan of Tony Hawk but for the amateur jackasses in the parking lot at Food Lion and in my neighborhood, shove off. You just look like an asshole in your skinny jeans and greasy ass hair style) who thinks you look bitchin’ out there? Well you’re wrong.

Book Review: The Hunger Games Trilogy

The Hunger Games Trilogy by Suzanne Collins

I’m a little ashamed that it’s taken me several weeks to prepare this review because I want everyone to drop what they’re currently reading and read this trilogy straight through. I’m waiting. First of all, I want to thank my friend Leslie for sharing the second and third books in the series with me. She saved me a fortune and made me love my Nook even more because of the LendMe option that it proudly boasts. Take that Kindle. Ok, down to business. The Hunger Games trilogy begins with the first book, aptly titled The Hunger Games. The heroine is Katniss Everdeen, a fiery girl who is chosen to represent her sector of Panem, a post-war United States lead by President Snow in The Capital, which I believe is a representation of Colorado is my memory serves me correctly. The Hunger Games are the way the Capital exerts control and power over all of the members of the sectors and it’s mission is to have young people “randomly” selected from the different sectors fight to the death for all the citizens of Panem to watch on television. Sounds riveting and sadly, I can imagine Americans watching something like this on tv for sport as long as it wasn’t happening in our country as long as it was entertaining.

 So blah blah blah, she goes into the Hunger Games, is conflicted by love (which is a little too reminiscent of the Twilight series for me and I was almost rooting for Team Anyone but Katniss) and eventually pisses the Capital off with her antics during the games. And that’s book one. Books two and three (The Girl on Fire and Mockingjay respectively) continue to follow her struggle against the Capital and how she becomes a figurehead for a rebellion against Snow and his beliefs.

I’m not going to spoil the whole thing, but it really is an enjoyable read and good for these dog days of summer while you get those last few minutes out by the pool. It’s a young adult book, but it’s got much heavier issues than Twilight did and I’ll say it’s as entertaining as a vampire-human-wolf love triangle since all of these people are human. Though I wouldn’t mind if when they release the movie Taylor Lautner makes a cameo without his shirt on.